Disclaimer: They're starting to smell funny. Want them?

 

 

 

 

 

"I hate this wig. With surprising passion. Can I burn it after this?"

"Stop your whining."

Jack spat out a bobby pin. "It can't be that bad, Neil. My wig isn't bugging me."

"Why doesn't Alec need one? Alec is a fucker."

"My hair's already long enough. Nyah."

Jack sighed. "Here, let me help you. I'll fix your makeup while I'm at it."

"Uh..."

"So. Ruffles?"

"My girlfriend likes them."

"Prissy victorian lady. It works, in a twisted way."

"Whatever, Pocahantas."

"Should I accidentally take your eye out with a pin, I'd like to apologize ahead of time," said Jack, moving into a better position to futz around with Neil's costume.

"You're good at this..."

"I am. Did I ever tell you about my older brother Joan?"

Alec grabbed a bite from his sandwich as he examined his skirt in the mirror. "I look like a skank."

"You are a skank. Joan?"

"Mm. He decided he needed to teach me everything he knew. It was kind of like the jedi/padawan relationship from hell. He was convinced I was going to need this at some point. Of course, my parents found out a year later and objected but by then it was too late. I knew how to colour coordinate."

"Joan?"

"He thought it was pretty. I try to call him a she to his face. Hold still, finishing it up."

"Can you do me next?" asked Alec, brushing his hair.

Jack nodded and patted Neil's wig into place. "Voila. 'e is so pret~ty!"

"You're never choosing our Halloween costume theme again, Jack."